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Something in her brain that still remained calm told her that she was doing a very foolish thing indeed.
-Jean Rhys
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Something In Her Brain That Still Remained

Jean Rhys
Something in her brain that still remained calm told her that she was doing a very foolish thing indeed.
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Brain Calm Foolish

More From Jean Rhys

She didn’t understand why it was happening,” he said. “i had to tell her she would die. her social worker said i had to tell her. i had to tell her she would die, so i told her she was going to heaven. she asked if i would be there, and i said that i would not, not yet. but eventually, she said, and i promised that yes, of course, very soon. and i told her that in the meantime we had great family up there that would take care of her. and she asked me when i would be there, and i told her soon. twenty-two years ago.
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She bent her finger and then straightened it. the mystery was in the instant before it moved, the dividing moment between not moving and moving, when her intention took effect. it was like a wave breaking. if she could only find herself at the crest, she thought, she might find the secret of herself, that part of her that was really in charge. she brought her forefinger closer to her face and stared at it, urging it to move. it remained still because she was pretending... . and when she did crook it finally, the action seemed to start in the finger itself, not in some part of her mind.
Moving Waves Breaking Secret
She was beautiful, but not like those girls in the magazines. she was beautiful, for the way she thought. she was beautiful, for the sparkle in her eyes when she talked about something she loved. she was beautiful, for her ability to make other people smile, even if she was sad. no, she wasn't beautiful for something as temporary as her looks. she was beautiful, deep down to her soul. she is beautiful.
Beauty Beautiful Girl
She had taken to wondering lately, during these swift-counted years, what had been done with all those wasted summer days; how could she have spent them so wantonly? i am foolish, she told herself early every summer, i am very foolish; i am grown up now and know the values of things. nothing is ever really wasted, she believed sensibly, even one's childhood, and then each year, one summer morning, the warm wind would come down the city street where she walked and she would be touched with the little cold thought: i have let more time go by.
Summer Morning Taken
She comes to me when she wants to be fed. and after i feed her -- guess what -- she's off to wherever she wants to be in the house, until the next time she gets hungry. she's smart enough to know she can't feed herself. she's actually a very smart cat. she gets loved. she gets adoration. she gets petted. she gets fed. and she doesn't have to do anything for it, which is why i say this cat's taught me more about women, than anything my whole life.
Smart Stupid Cat
She asked me what was wrong, and i told her i had to end it. she was surprised, and asked my why i thought so. i told her it wasn't a thought, more a feeling, like i couldn't breathe and knew i had to get some air. it was a survival instinct, i told her. she said it was time for dinner. then she sat me down and told me not to worry. she said moments like this were like waking up in the middle of the night: you're scared, your'e disoriented, and you're completely convinced you're right. but then you stay awake a little longer and you realize things aren't as fearful as they seem.
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