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You know what's really frightening? you (jon stewart) actually have an influence on this presidential election. that is scary, but it's true. you've got stoned slackers watching your dopey show every night and they can vote.
Saturday night at my house, i often trot out classic movies and force the urchins to watch them. there is much wailing and gnashing of teeth, but i think it's important to teach kids about american culture, and films are certainly a big part of it.
The night is a strawberry.
George eliot is my only steady girlfriend. we go to bed together every night.
You'll note that politicians no longer spend money, they invest it. don't worry about paying more to the [irs]. you aren't being taxed; you're taking a plunge on a fly-by-night stock issue.
Finally, one night we were smoking pot [with michael o'donoghue] and talking about the people that are invariably in high school, whether you go to prep school or public school or ghetto school or rich suburban school. and actually, it spun off from a kurt vonnegut quote.
From national lampoon, you go directly to saturday night live, because it's a lot of the same people.
Then saturday night live spawns... well, everything right down to american pie 9, where all humor has to be irrelevant, which can get a little tiring.
The greenpeace booth at all the rock and roll shows nowadays are akin to the old sorcerers who used to stand in the middle of villages warning of danger, 'when night wolf swallows mother moon, there will be great famine.'
Dates used to be made days or even weeks in advance. now dates tend to be made the day after. that is, you get a phone call from someone who says, "if anyone asks, i was out to dinner with you last night, okay?"
The little plumpuppets are fairies of beds; they have nothing to do but watch sleepyheads; they turn down the sheets and they tuck you in tight, and dance on your pillow to wish you good night!
But you built me dreams instead.
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