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List of Lewis Grizzard Quotes

Explore our hand-picked selection of 38 inspiring quotes by Lewis Grizzard.

About Lewis Grizzard

  • Born: October 20, 1946
  • Died: March 20, 1994
  • Occupation: Writer
    • Let's all start walking more and driving less.
    Driving Walking
    Sex hasn't been the same since women started enjoying it.
    Love Life Sex
    I grew up in a very large family in a very small house. i never slept alone until after i was married.
    Funny Relationship Marriage
    If you are not the lead dog, your scenery never changes.
    Dog Never Change Scenery
    They tore out my heart and stomped that sucker flat.
    Heart Sadness Flats
    On a new york subway you get fined for spitting, but you can throw up for nothing.
    Travel New York Fun
    Elvis is dead and i don't feel so good for myself.
    Feel Good Feels
    When my love returns from the ladies room, will i be too old to care?
    Valentines Day Valentine Care
    Life is a sexually transmitted terminal disease.
    Funny Humor Perspective
    Mama had an appreciation of the language. she taught me a love of words, of how they should be used and how they can fill a creative soul with a passion and lead to a life's work.
    Appreciation Passion Creative
    If love were oil, / i'd be about a quart low.
    Love Oil Lows
    Spring time is the land awakening.
    Spring Land Awakening
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