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If anyone wants one my advise is to go where the orthodox jews shop, because when it comes to a big black fedora, the guys with ringlets and long black coats definitely know a stylish hat when they see one. you want to get it home and use a hot steaming kettle, and bob's your uncle - you have a hat with all the right curves!
-Terry Pratchett
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If Anyone Wants One My Advise Is

Terry Pratchett
If anyone wants one my advise is to go where the orthodox jews shop, because when it comes to a big black fedora, the guys with ringlets and long black coats definitely know a stylish hat when they see one. you want to get it home and use a hot steaming kettle, and bob's your uncle - you have a hat with all the right curves!
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Uncles Home Curves

More From Terry Pratchett

Today's uncle tom doesn't wear a handkerchief on his head. this modern, twentieth-century uncle thomas now often wears a top hat. he's usually well-dressed and well-educated. he's often the personification of culture and refinement. the twentieth-century uncle thomas sometimes speaks with a yale or harvard accent. sometimes he is known as professor, doctor, judge, and reverend, even right reverend doctor. this twentieth-century uncle thomas is a professional negro -by that i mean his profession is being a negro for the white man.
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My grandma ricky - that's where i got classic look from. she was the most stylish person ever. she had her own clothing store and even her furniture was stylish. i got my "flashy, but classy" motto from her, too. whenever she walked in the room, she was always the most stylish person in the room.
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Dad told uncle seth not to screw things up,” she informed me as we washed our hands. “he said even if uncle seth is famous, him getting a woman like you defies belief.” i laughed and smoothed down the skirt of my dress. “i don’t know about that. i don’t think your dad gives your uncle enough credit." brandy gave me a sage look, worthy of someone much older. “uncle seth spent last valentine’s day at a library.
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Just as uncle tom, back during slavery used to keep the negroes from resisting the bloodhound or resisting the ku klux klan by teaching them to love their enemies or pray for those who use them despitefully, today martin luther king is just a twentieth-century or modern uncle tom or religious uncle tom, who is doing the same thing today to keep negroes defenseless in the face of attack that uncle tom did on the plantation to keep those negroes defenseless in the face of the attack of the klan in that day.
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These false jews promote the filth of hollywood that is seeding the american people and the people of the world and bringing you down in moral strength. … it's the wicked jews, the false jews, that are promoting lesbianism, homosexuality. it's the wicked jews, false jews, that make it a crime for you to preach the word of god, then they call you homophobic!
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